Her

kismetandstardust — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 03:26:00 +0000

So today I found out about her. I find it really funny that her name sounds almost like your first gf’s name. I find it also funny that I went psycho and googled. her. Yes, I googled her. I am so pathetic it hurts! Still, I found no picture of her anywhere. It would be nice to know what she looks like…

Haay I am one psycho bitch!

6 Years After

kismetandstardust — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 02:03:18 +0000

Who would thought that I would still be this affected? I thought by this time I would have forgotten, and I would have mastered the art of nonchalance. Turns out six years after, just a flash of your name on my monitor, and I’m back to that place I never want to be in again.

Why can’t you be just like the other boys? When will you be a passing fancy? When will anything about you stop tormenting me?

I found comfort in the idea of “out of sight, out of mind.” I had solace in knowing that you were anti-social online. I rejoiced in having that space between us because I felt safe. I felt strong. – Until you added me on facebook!

I don’t know whether I should laugh at myself or slap myself for being, once again, in the hands of memories of the past. But you see, when it’s about you, it is never the past. You’re like a movie that I just put on pause, but never really finish and keep away in the shelves.

If I admit to myself that I will never reach that point of forgetting you and erasing you totally in my head and ripping you off my heart, will this be easier? I guess not.

I even created a blog dedicated solely to you! Oh God. I’m doomed.

A Walk To Remember

Her

6 Years After